You know, your stereotypical fairytale princess is pretty ungrateful. I mean, she has an entire keep all to herself. Sure, she's imprisoned there by a dragon, but come on, most peasant girls would give their right arms to have their own keep, dragon or not. Meanwhile, little miss princess throws a hissy fit because her spectacular full-landscape-view apartment has a giant lizard guardian. If I had a huge firebreathing property protector, I sure wouldn't be complaining about it. Beats the heck out of a pit bull.

Next, she has to be rescued by some clown in tin armor. I can't begin to comprehend why he dresses himself up in a conducting shell against a firebreathing foe unless it's the same reason you wrap potatoes in aluminum foil before you put them in the oven.

Anyway, he's got to climb all the way up to the top of this sorry, selfish broad's tower in full armor, kill the lizard thing, whisk her away, and then marry her. She wasn't even happy having her *own keep* and he think's he's going to make enough money killing lizards to appease her? Hello alimony payments.