That wiley Mr. Uhuru!

Mr. Uhuru sure has been spamming my inbox as of late. He even sent me his passport. This is my latest reply:

Dear Uhuru,

I am being most sorry that I have been unable to answer your latest email.
Unfortunately, I caught the amish virus and all of my computers files were
deleted. I lost everything at work too and have spent the last couple of days
trying to restore everything. This is the second time I have gotten the amish

Anyway, I have fixed everything and should not be having any more delays. Sorry
for the inconvenience.

Could you resend me any relevant emails that I might have lost?

Thank you.

With manly affections,

If you don't know what the Amish virus is, it's a classic joke that goes something like this:

You have just received the Amish Virus.

Since we do not have electricity or computers, you are on the honor system.

Please delete all of your files.

Thank thee.

With the last scammer I had, I told him that I got the "Rasher virus" (named after a friend) which "deletes all of your system-critical files and replaces them with pictures of your cat".

It's ironic that these guys will believe anything.