A Month of Lame October Surprises

When I think of "October Surprise" I think of something like "Bush stole a candybar from a 7/11 when he was 14 (not to mention the 2000 election)" or "Kerry's backyard is full of unmarked hobo graves".

But this year these guys are just lame. "Texans for Truth" has released a video clip of Bush giving the one-fingered salute.

Reminds me of a joke: "You know what this is?" *makes hand flat* "No, what?" "It's the Fourier transform of this!" *flips the bird*

Sorry. Us math majors have an odd sense of humor.

But that is really a lame October Surprise. Heck, Kerry blurted out the word itself in a Rolling Stone interview last year: "Did I expect George Bush to f--- it up as badly as he did? I don't think anybody did." Maybe the Democrats are hoping to turn off the evangelical Christians Bush is counting on as one of his major voting blocks this year, but I think they are really just helping his tough guy image. And Bush looking tough plays to John "the liberal weiner" Kerry's disadvantage.

And then there was the story of a bunch of explosives that have been missing since time began. Too bad that didn't come up before the debates. I think Bush could haved used that to show definitively how unrealistic it is to find any of the alleged WMDs in Iraq, even if Saddam Hussein were producing truckloads every day. It's just too easy to make them disappear without a trace.

Then there's Bush, who doesn't have diddly squat going on Kerry, except for possibly a bin Laden sighting reported in the South Asia Tribune (courtesy William).

Well, I'm sure the major news outlets will cook up something interesting about Bush by election-eve (fyi CBS was planning on releasing the missing explosives story on Sunday).

If not, perhaps I can save the election from a dull finish. I mean, CBS will print just about anything... *runs to play with photoshop*