It was awesome to see my friend up in Colorado this weekend. It will surely take another week to heal. I will avoid giving too many details because it's another 5 years before we exceed the relevant statutes of limitations in Colorado, but I will mention that we saw "The Incredibles" which is just an awesome movie. Definitely see that instead of "Bloody Gore and Unnecessary Sex Scenes with No Plot III" or whatever else it is that's showing in theaters now.
Anyway, afterward we had some ideas for our own superheros. Here are some of mine:
Seemingly Innocuous Man-- never seems a threat to anyone."Hey, if you don't mind I'm going to go strap this bomb to your secret death ray device." "Oh, not a problem, it's down the hall and to the right, Seemingly Innocuous Man. But don't tell anyone else; some superheros have been trying to destroy it."
Cephalopod-- like an ordinary man, but has only one foot. "Yay, we robbed the bank!" "Surrender, felons, I have only one foot!" "Ahh! It's Cephalopod! We surrender, we surrender!"
Middle-class Maniac-- is able to assume all the powers of the working-class. He can file paperwork, deliver mail, drive trucks, and many other useful things.
The Cognitive Dissonant-- He says one thing, means another, and does a third. No one is really sure what is up with this guy.
Without Powers Guy-- An ordinary citizen who just likes to dress in spandex.
Elvis-- another non-superhero; Elvis mostly just hangs around at superhero headquarters and helps himself to the fridge. He is king of rock and roll and the remote control.
Discretely Differentiable Man-- only differentiable on discrete intervals; he is the superheros' best bet against Math Fiend,
Philosophocles-- able to turn any situation into an existential quandary.
Banterer-- able to ruin villainous monologues with his witty banter.
Now I just need supervillains to pit them up against. Preferably ones who are not unionized. Maybe there will be some in the yellow pages.P.S. I'll find my frog. Who took my frog?
- earth day
- green toilet
- harsh realities
- interior decorating
- white people