Why is my window lopsided?
This is the question I am now asking myself. A good answer might be that the building itself is lopsided. In fact, I know this to be true. That is why stuff on my desk will sometimes roll in a westerly direction.
You would think that one of the nation's top engineering schools would have better architecture. But that just goes to show how grossly misguided you are. Engineers are not architects--architects care about quality, aesthetic value, complying with federal safety codes, and all other sorts of meaningless friviolities that an engineer would never even consider.
Ironically. however, the architecture code is the only--and I mean only--building code that our new student union building has successfully passed.
It's really marvelously embarrassing, actually. We were supposed to move in after spring break, but I think our chances of that happening were pretty much shot when one of the iron grates at the food court fell and hit one of the building inspectors.
Of the more interesting oversights is that the venting shaft from the kitchen, which is supposed to dissipate smoke from the ovens, disappears somewhere around the second floor and neglects to emerge anywhere past the third. I'm sure I'm only one of countless persons who have rhetorically wondered where exactly the contractors thought all that smoke was supposed to go? The second floor, apparently.
I'm quite convinced that sixty years hence they will still be discovering things such as "the radiator will cut out after ten minutes unless you turn the bathroom lights on and the kitchen fan off first." Well, provided the building doesn't collapse and kill everyone inside long before then.
Which brings me back to my initial question: Why is my window--and dormitory--lopsided? My hypothesis is that the construction work in our new student union building in so incredibly shoddy that it's starting to destabilize the other buildings on campus. Heck, it's probably destabilizing the structure of the entire universe. It's only a matter of time before our whole planet is as lopsided as my window.
I recommend you all invest in some lunar realestate in the near future.
- earth day
- green toilet
- harsh realities
- interior decorating
- white people