"News"

In an unfortunate twist of irony, an Amish teen was electrocuted.

Personally, I'm a big fan of the Amish. Probably the most principled group of people there is, even if they are a part of evil U.N. conspiracies

This is just an amusing headline: "Squirrel expert pays ex-weapons scientists to resist temptation". So many possibilties. Reminds me of a spam I got: "See the best tacky epidemiological horrors on the web!" I'm still afraid to open it, but it is the first piece of spam to truly amuse me.

Crazy teddies are the latest political taboo. Remind me to order one.

I've warned you before about the cows' dangerous acquaintance with human technology. Now it looks like they're developing undersea technologies. I'm telling you, we are on the brink of a bovine revolution.

Telling lawyer jokes may be a criminal offense. Yeah, as if we didn't hate them enough already, this will certainly help their image.

What's worse, hitting a dog, or hitting a guy in a dog suit? He's lucky he wasn't hurt, they probably would have put him to sleep.

NASA is planning to smash a hole in a comet. Maybe if they can portray comets as a threat to national security they will be able to snag some DOE funding. Really, though, why are tax dollars going to fund chemical analysis of extra-planetary ice? Mars exploration at least has the potential to be useful.

Rednecks may have a survival advantage in the event of a nuclear holocaust. I think the only thing hippies are inclined to survive is an attack by flesh eating tye-dye aliens that smell like patchouli.

Pointed out to me by Frank, Michelle Malkin has reprinted some of the hatemail she gets for being a Filipino conservative (warning, explicit content).

What digusting jerks. I can only presume these cowards carry out their harrassment anonymously over email because if they said these kind of things in public, fellows like me would not be able to control the urge to deck them.

Anyway, Michelle Malkin is really a great columnist. You should all should all check her out and send her some nice mail. :)

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